Wednesday, September 28, 2011

An Interview with Hina Rabbani Khar, foreign minister of Pakistan.


Forward Ho (FH) caught up with Hina Rabbani Khar (HRK) in New York on the sidelines of the UN meet. Though, in keeping with her status as the FM of an Islamic Nation, dressed in a monotone conservative outfit she looked gorgeous and welcomed FH with a disarming smile.

After the formal introduction we settled down to chat over a cup of tea and samosas.

FH. We are fortunate that you did not return to Pakistan in a huff……

HRB: But who said I was leaving?

FH: It was in the media…..

HRB: Oh that! After spitting fire at the US, I said I was returning….to my hotel and as usual the media assumed and left the scene midway to be the first one to report I was returning to Pakistan…if only they had waited for me to complete the sentence…..

FH: I must say you look ravishingly …….

HRB:  Beg your pardon what was that?

FH: I was saying you are pushing the US to the brink….

HRB: What pushing? They are already on the brink; if I push any further they will fall.

FH: But the Haqquani network working in tandem with ISI is an original idea I must say…

HRB: What is original about it? The CIA worked with them in the 1970s and 1980s mostly through ISI. Then they left when the Russians left Afghanistan. The ISI found no compulsions to leave as Pakistan was only a mule ride away from the Afghan mountains.

FH: OK. Be that as it were…would you call your visit to India a success?

HRB: (already lit up eyes lighting up more….) Oh Yes! Yes! Yes! All the brands have reported significant increase in sales……

FH: Beg your pardon?

HRB: You know the Jimmy Choos, Hermès Birkin et al..

FH:  Oh! But I meant the relations between India and Pakistan….

HRB: Oh that too was on a high. I got a lot of admirers and got an endearing reception wherever I went. My Roberto Cavalli sunglasses & classic pearl jewelry were unprecedented hits. Indian people just loved them.

FH: You suppose some of them would have fallen in love with you too…

HRB: What was that….

FH: Do you feel, following your visit the Indian people’s love for Pakistan would have increased manifold?

HRB: I am somewhat sure about the men…they are all the same. But about the women I can’t say…you know they have their own ideas about other women.

FH: (exasperated) I was asking about the relations between the two countries India and Pakistan.

HRB: For a moment I did not realize they were different countries…this matter about foreign relations et al was not in my agenda.

FH: (hiding the surprise) Oh! Did you get any offer from Bollywood?

HRB: Yes and No. But why would I need that?

FH: It is rumored that Khayani will soon take over the reins of Pakistan. Then you will be out of a job. Many in Bollywood will welcome you with open arms and so will many Indians.

HRB: I have learned that when you are hitting the driver straight do not strive for distance…If you try to force the shot it will go nowhere.

FH:  So, you play golf?

HRB:  No. No. No. My husband who plays golf (FH is a bit surprised) tells me this in the evenings…..

FH: (disappointed) YOU are MARRIED?

HRB: I have two daughters, Annaya and Dina. My husband is Feroze Gulzar a……..

FH: Never mind I am sure you have a slew of appointments lined up. It was a pleasure talking with you……..

Friday, September 16, 2011

Teacher's Day



Today is teacher’s day, celebrated on the birthday of the great philosopher and teacher Dr. Sarvepalli Radhakrishnan a former President of India. It is unfortunate that in a Nation which traditionally revers the gurus, the teacher today does not get deserved reverence. The causes are many leading to a situation much like the chicken and egg story.

On this day I remember sekharan maash (maash in Malayalam = teacher) (SM) my mathematics teacher at school. In his fifties even then, he was the first recipient of Presidents Medal from Kerala, in the early 1960s. Everyday he came to school in spotless white, trousers, full sleeved shirt and black shoes. He wore no belt. In those days all of us wore designer clothes. Readymade dresses were in the market only for children. Hence the tailored trousers fitted well around the waist. A belt was not required to hold it up.  In those days when even calculators were unavailable he taught us the mysterious ways with numbers and formulae showing us how uncomplicated mathematics can be. All great teachers are good human beings too.

SM’s house was located bang opposite the best theatre in town, which screened Hinidi movies in Kannur. (Umayal theatre in Kannur (Cannanore, then)).  He knew when some of us sneaked out from the hostel for night shows. He would confront us the next day one on one. No complaints no complications; only some extra sums as homework. He had a class room set up in his garden at home. All weak students reported there soon after school for some extra coaching. He never ever charged for these tuitions!!!!! He had the best rose garden in town with many varieties of roses in different colours and hues.  Not once would he pick even one rose. He let them blossom, bloom and wither in the bush. But any day he would give away a cutting of even the rarest of rare variety with a smile. Yes, he always had a smile to give away. These two hobbies of SM then are big business today – Therein lies a lacuna.

 A cynic will say, they never make them like that these days – but I say teaching is the noblest profession ever…..teachers are not made they are born to be teachers….On teachers'  day I pay my respects to all those who were, are and will be teachers.


Thursday, September 1, 2011

A reflection on Indian sports on the occasion of Messi's visit to India




Lionel Messi
Or Andre Agassi
They are all top notch
And difficult to match
For an Indian in a jiffy.

Messi joined Barcelona at thirteen
From him only hard work and dedication was seen
Indian sportsmen are easily distracted
To wealth and women they get attracted
Soon from being they become had been

In my lifetime can we put up
An Indian team for soccer world cup    (final)
It is of course a dream
But can’t we build a team
And make the world sit up.