The gardener

“The gardener has gone on a month’s leave”. I stole a glance at the Lady of the House (LOH) and quickly returned to page three of the newspaper. I made out the LOH was concerned. The equilibrium in our life is being disturbed. The absent gardener will necessitate alternate arrangements to care for all those plants nurtured so lovingly at various cantonments of the country in pots and finally finding a permanent place in our garden. “Can you send some one from the office?” I knew this was coming. The LOH could not send some one from whatever she was involved in. If the maid is given this additional task she will neglect an equivalent chunk from her lot. Everyone is not as efficient as Kapil Sibal. The assistant maid has her own duties and will not take on the duties of the maid, a la the Ex MOS for Railways, Mukul Roy who refused to visit an accident site as he was not the minister himself.

The duties of the drivers were non negotiable, being a specialized job entailing holding of statutory authorization by way of driving licenses. The washer man could be given the job. But there is a chance he may use soap water destroying the plants and adversely affecting the environment. Giving the job to the security team is fraught with danger as the house could be burgled while these sentinels played in the garden. These days one can’t rely on the neighbours (or their staff) to do anything for you as they have their own agenda diametrically opposite of ours. They may use the opportunity to destroy our plants.

We could induct a new temporary gardener. Being temporary he is likely to be careless and most of the time could be on his mobile phone looking for permanent placements. All these thoughts passed my mind in a flash and before I was asked “Are you listening?” I said “Ok, I will play only half the course every day and tend the garden for the next month”

Phew!!! It is much easier to reshuffle the cabinet in a coalition government these days!!!!!